I expected to update sooner.
Indeed I did.
Summer has passed in spectacular style. I weigh the same as when I left (not actually a bad achievement in itself), the job front vapourised in a second, the 21st was spectacular, and the trips around Europe and the USA were breathtaking all by themselves. Saw the family for ages, enjoyed being able to legally gamble in Vegas and drink anywhere in the US for the first time, and have generally been making the most of life. I discovered the true value of money. spending just enough of what you have to enjoy life. I believe now that when I work I would settle for lesser pay so long as I got the leisure I wanted. I'm here on Earth to enjoy myself, after all.
The third year of university now presents itself. A challenge of new proportions, a genuine effort now commanded to actually pass this time around. I only had to do four finals all year, and although difficult in themselves, the fact I could study for all of them strongly meant that I could make a decent stab at all of them. The exams in June were passed reasonably well, although I will admit to being pleasently surprised by my economics mark and dissappointed by my Intl Relations one. the Microeconomics resit was a bit tougher (especially after getting backl from Europe) but I passed it sufficiently well to get into honours at my uni. This is what scares me now, now just having to pass reasonably, but having to do well as to qualify with a 1 or 2.1 degree. A Masters in Economics and Intl Relations would set me up nicely for my career, I'm told, but none the less I am faced with the prospect that such a good pass is beyond me.
This may simply be pre-term nerves, and it hasn't had much effect (at least by now) beyond the obvious anxiety. Whereas my rational mind dismisses it, however, I still feel apprehensive, especially with regards to my own ability. I have always been expected to do well in what I attempt, but more and more I realise that my chosen path is going to begin to really test me. I have always done well in acedemics, and I feel now that I am expected to succeed now, by my friends and family, who inform me I [i]have[/i] the ability and yet they themselves seem to have fallen by the wayside. At least, they did when they were my age, and I find myself conciously noting how much farther in my education I have gone than them and how much farther they wish me to go in it, given what they experienced. I keep putting my feelings of inadequacy down to nerves, and I hope that is simply it.
Nonetheless, having not yet failed an exam or paper, and looking forward to my course I am optimistic. I am glad I'm going into the same flats with the same guys from the last two years, which removes a fair few worries. The new flat (on the same complex) is larger and airier, and my room especially is much more spacious than before. Going to be able to cram more stuff in, and I'm going to enjoy the feeling of...newness to the place. Should be good.
Of course unfortunately I'm forced to move up two days after getting back from America. Damn advisor interviews. Nonetheless, I'm glad I am on honours and at least I have no additional exams to worry about this January. A mixture of Intl Relations and Economics is going to mean a relatively exam-light, coursework-heavy schedule, which suits me fine, as I tend to be a better writer with more words and time to play with.
Athiesm and current liberal views in place.
Good luck to all who are returning to uni this week.
TTYL.
Summer has passed in spectacular style. I weigh the same as when I left (not actually a bad achievement in itself), the job front vapourised in a second, the 21st was spectacular, and the trips around Europe and the USA were breathtaking all by themselves. Saw the family for ages, enjoyed being able to legally gamble in Vegas and drink anywhere in the US for the first time, and have generally been making the most of life. I discovered the true value of money. spending just enough of what you have to enjoy life. I believe now that when I work I would settle for lesser pay so long as I got the leisure I wanted. I'm here on Earth to enjoy myself, after all.
The third year of university now presents itself. A challenge of new proportions, a genuine effort now commanded to actually pass this time around. I only had to do four finals all year, and although difficult in themselves, the fact I could study for all of them strongly meant that I could make a decent stab at all of them. The exams in June were passed reasonably well, although I will admit to being pleasently surprised by my economics mark and dissappointed by my Intl Relations one. the Microeconomics resit was a bit tougher (especially after getting backl from Europe) but I passed it sufficiently well to get into honours at my uni. This is what scares me now, now just having to pass reasonably, but having to do well as to qualify with a 1 or 2.1 degree. A Masters in Economics and Intl Relations would set me up nicely for my career, I'm told, but none the less I am faced with the prospect that such a good pass is beyond me.
This may simply be pre-term nerves, and it hasn't had much effect (at least by now) beyond the obvious anxiety. Whereas my rational mind dismisses it, however, I still feel apprehensive, especially with regards to my own ability. I have always been expected to do well in what I attempt, but more and more I realise that my chosen path is going to begin to really test me. I have always done well in acedemics, and I feel now that I am expected to succeed now, by my friends and family, who inform me I [i]have[/i] the ability and yet they themselves seem to have fallen by the wayside. At least, they did when they were my age, and I find myself conciously noting how much farther in my education I have gone than them and how much farther they wish me to go in it, given what they experienced. I keep putting my feelings of inadequacy down to nerves, and I hope that is simply it.
Nonetheless, having not yet failed an exam or paper, and looking forward to my course I am optimistic. I am glad I'm going into the same flats with the same guys from the last two years, which removes a fair few worries. The new flat (on the same complex) is larger and airier, and my room especially is much more spacious than before. Going to be able to cram more stuff in, and I'm going to enjoy the feeling of...newness to the place. Should be good.
Of course unfortunately I'm forced to move up two days after getting back from America. Damn advisor interviews. Nonetheless, I'm glad I am on honours and at least I have no additional exams to worry about this January. A mixture of Intl Relations and Economics is going to mean a relatively exam-light, coursework-heavy schedule, which suits me fine, as I tend to be a better writer with more words and time to play with.
Athiesm and current liberal views in place.
Good luck to all who are returning to uni this week.
TTYL.
posted by Freethinker84 @ 1:37 am
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